I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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