he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
