he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize