she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize