a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
