so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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