I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
