Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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