Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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