jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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