hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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