What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
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