I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
