tell your sister to shave her snatch
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Boobs speak an international language.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
