And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
