thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
