This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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