I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
