what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
