what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
farters have to be the big spoon...
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
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