Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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