don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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