He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
