dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
