its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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