My first STD was from a foam party
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
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