And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
