Its about making memories worth repressing
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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