White coat. Heels.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
