So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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