toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Of course I have a pirate flag
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
