Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
