do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Randomize
