4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
