Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
we have officially lost it.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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