im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
it glows. i had to have it.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
