you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Randomize
