Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
