i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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