Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
