No, you can still breathe under the balls.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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