I'm jealous of your bromance
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
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