I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Randomize
