not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Randomize
