I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I'm at about main and main street
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Dick very happy bro
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
