I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
