So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
