I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize