is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i permit you to call me
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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