barbara walters just said penis...
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Randomize
